Kissing up to your boss is a must if you want to get ahead: Do you agree?

Its not the only way to move ahead, but needs to be done. It is not easy to just step into a work environment & be accepted unconditionally - one has to work their way up &/or stay in the fray!

Playing along is a way of finding your bearings & getting to know what you are up against, esp what effort can get you where in how much time!

It is swinging extremities, by saying totally for or dead against - ask someone who has is a standout in a particular work environment - like the lone North Indian in a company of 4000 South Indians! Or an Expat Country Manager in a foriegn country, managing 2000 people without knowing the language!

Your credentials get you the opportunity but how you fit in & manage the show to come out tops, depends totally on how you deal with it! Believe me, these may not be spoken of much, but do exist. You just need to hear of it from someone who has been in it!

I would not agree with "Kissing up to your boss", but you still need to have good relationship with the people above you in the hierarchy. In addition to hard and smart work relationships also play a key role in your careers progress.

Hard work will only get you up to a certain level, beyond that, if you aspire to be in the senior management, relationships with your seniors will play an equally important role compared to hard and smart work.

Regards,

Om Deshpande

i support sinha's view.

I support Gargi's view that those people who are kissing around their boss do not have caliber to prove themselves and organisation should not promote such culture because it would lead to negetive impact on the organisation as a whole.

However, there are organisations where kissing around their boss is a practice in such a senario I think follow the race and also show your calibre to grow with the system. This is a corporate world and if you see your growth by flattering your boss in this way I dint see any reason why you should not do it when others are also doing it. Nobody will call you lame.

I don't agree kissing up to your boss is the only way to go ahead. I believe only those person go for this step, who don't have any knowledge,skill regarding their  job/ work profile,otherwise somebody is there they are ready to do  any thing only for making money,and one more thing who is expecting like Boss he is not a Boss.

I really support this idea of Miss Sawant. One should believe in oneself do their job honestly and try to meet the challenges ahead. This certainly will place you on top of others and you will feel happy about it as I am sure you will be getting positive views from your bosses. So be positive always and give your best in each areas of life ...

I fully agree with the views of Darshana Sawant.We should not use any unfair,unethical ways to go ahead.Honesty,sincierety,committement,hardwork shall only be the way to climb up the ladder.All other means are only temporary.Though this method may take some time such a person cannot go unnoticed and rewards are sure to come.We should also note that such persons are not perturbed by small happenings who will enjoy working with there heads high.

g.n.yoganarasimhan be(civil),mie,fiv,pgdv

I totally disagree with this statement.I believe that it soley depends on  your skills ,your carreer targets and how you start building your successful corporate ladder for own carreer growth.It also depends whether you  have a clarity on the path towards your career goal.For instance if you have a goal of starting your own business firm after 5 years of corporate life , i dont think you have to wait for someone else to come and build a ladder for you which will take you towards the foundation of business.You are bound to intiate things by your own.

if that is the whole mantra then i guess we have wasted our valuable time in studying , putting lot many efforts in growing up as a better person , thinking beign ambitious, etc..

Absolute non sense..even now i feel that iam wasting my time to answer this question but no ways had to answer this..

thanks for sharing ur past experiance mam.

well very improtant thing to learn  from this topic is "when u r right no one can let u down................."

Although majority is with "Disagree", this has become trend to butter your boss instead of developing your skill and it sucks when you are working with people of this kind.

Although if your boss is insisting on making you kiss,show him the middle finger and find a new job.

I dont agree with you . Kissing your boss will not lead you anywhere or at any position. but  one possibility could be "You will be kicked out from the office"....

Ultimately it depends on the type of a person your boss is.....

I am strongly agree with Darshana. If you have caliber, Intelligence you dont need to do this type of things.

5 o clock shadows  this is a PWD lingo .. am i right sire..

Mr Ahamed Mohiddin's argument put the person in the category of "five o'clock shadow"when he makes advances to the boss to entice him with hope to pacify him.But the bosses now a days are more enlightened to listen to juniors because of corporate objectives.

kicking the boss out of his job is prerequisite for occupying his postion ..

Let's take this case as a negative impact to the subordinate. All the praise you give to your boss impacts your performance/hike/promotion that's good, but friends, in this corporate environment how many of them will really do this? Let us believe in our strengths and go forward not for the boss. However situation may change according to the boss but after 10 or X years if you want to see yourself in a C-- position, do you really think you will justify the sam ewith your subordinates???? or let us think ME as an indivdual is a owner of a enterprise and I always want my employees to be sincere, honest and hard working but not those who are praising the boss...... so is the same where ever you are working

I agree with Ms.Darshna, only those will do this who do not have their own identity/skills/knowledge.

Is your boss a woman, Dharmena?? (just kidding) :)

I completely disagree. You have to be diplomatic and that is definitely not ass kissing!! There has to be a semblance of healthy relationship in terms of respect for the parties involved. The boss needs to respect the subordinate and vice versa. The sub can only earn this respect based on performance and boss by way of leadership and vision.

What the BOSS (ES) need to understand here is that its the team members that make them what they are!! Good interesting perspectives here... :)

I wonder how many of those saying they agree , will change their tune , if we phrase the above question a little differently as follows :

To get ahead in your career , will you cozy up to your boss irrespective of whether he / she is right or wrong ?

The harsh reality of life is to be cozy up to your boss.There is no denying the facts what most of the toostepians opposing Darshana's point of view have bared themselves.The others who are supporting such view have also a point .The politic is the KPI for most of the expressed views.In todays work culture,the boss alone is only the clown where as boss is bullish if co-opted by his juniors. The business run is to business fun if harmonious atmosphere is pervading.

Kissing up to the boss will never get you anywhere far.If you have to change bosses, are you going to suck up to them all? I have seen employees get sidelined because of this problem. I believe to move ahead you have to take your work seriously and perform to the best of your ability even if it means putting in extra time. Good performance always get recognised.

I had once had a bad experience with a former boss(Chief Accountant) where he gave me zero rating for my annual performance although he was not my immediate supervisor. I refused to sign so when it reach to the Finance Director he queried my rating since he knew I was an excellent worker. My supervisor was ordered to correct same and the Finance Director signed in the place of the Chief Accountant. I was then transferred to the Internal Audit Department since the Human Resources Manager was a no nonsense individual but left shortly after for a new job. In 2002 I got a best worker award at the Audit Office of Guyana after spending three(3) years in that office. 

This is a purely a perception.  

When a person is working with true potential and show value addition which creates uniqueness-boss will start liking.  When once his/her work is impressing boss, boss will start giving more and more work.  But then starts the drama as others think that this person is kissing boss, in fact it is other way around.

I support you. Some people think its smart act. I pity on those people. It clearly shows that he/she is a handicapp, because he/she is dependant on others for their success. This way you are allways UNHAPPY since you can not live without others. Please do not encourage kissing up because indirectly pointing you that you are not capable of handling it. You need to have COURAGE to stand right and Lead your life.

Dear Mr. Shyam ,

You have written a lot about bosses. I do not know whether most of it is true , because my bosses have been nice people , though they may have been bad bosses.

I would like to ask a question of you ; please don't think it is aimed at you. Are you a boss at present ? Or , do you intend to be a boss some day ?

If so , would all that you have written apply to you ? Or , would you be the ideal boss ?

I think if only we can relate to one another as humans , each of us having their own problems to either live with or overcome , the world would be a better place. Buttering one's boss might not be necessary then.

I agree with what Darshana said. Those people who are kissing around their boss should be called as lame. They are people who believe on luck and not hard work. They don't have core competence and use others to come up. So do your work and get recognized.

Thanks....     

I disagree there is no need to hang around your boss to go ahead in the organization. It is your talent and attitude that takes you high. Every employee gets recognized only when he do his work properly. So be sincere and loyal to what you do you will automatically grow.

Thanks....    

if a person is not confident enough in himself, he may have to go his boss's way. If he is confident of his ability, there is no need to be a servant to his boss. If the boss holds ones growing  abilities like promotion or bonuses and things like that ,in current circumstances ,he can point out to his boss why this happens or  he can take up a better offer in a better company. Nowaday world over companies accept TALENT and RESULT

Wow, I certainly wonder where all these topics pop-up from last it was something related to Appraisal systems, now much more specific onto growth of individual in an organization.

It will really tough for any organization to grow, incase of individual growing due to his boss. But also I dont deny there is no cases available in any organization. These type of issues not only de-motivate the others, also it will bring-down performance of an individual in case of repitition. If the colleague of same cadre will grow without any sincere output becoz of boss and if I grow with my potential will definetly bring down my efficiency in that particular organization. So in such situation the BOSS IS QUESTIONABLE!!!

Corporates have emerged from assessing an employee exclusively on the basis of his performance as assessed by his Boss. The 360  degree appraisal system and the mentoring process has all lead to make employee performance reasonably transperant,plus the factor pay for performance has allowed the employees to escalate if he feels his appraisal scoring is biased. In short the evolution of open  HR policies is defently working for fair ad deserving  promotion process.I therefore don't agree that boss remains the sole king maker

There is a sort of Catch-22 situation here: If the boss likes kissing-up then s/he is not a boss worth kissing-up. In other words, a boss who values the subordinates on the basis of their ability to flatter him will get flattery and not real work so the subordinates can go on kissing-up leading to a situation where the boss and the subordinates will both be incompetent and will not last in the long-run. A boss who is immune to flattery will value the subordinates on the basis of their work in which case the subordinates need not kiss-up. Ideally, there should be no kissing-up but occasionally one can certainly give genuine appreciation for the boss's efforts since the boss is also a human being and needs some psychological stroking, sometimes.  

Is a certain orgnizationstrat and end for an individual? Can he/she have change and let his/her ethics/moral/dignity not be disturbed otherwise?

I also do not agree with this.This is obvious. But this also depends on the boss. If the boss likes that Kissing up approach without any relevant work from their employees then fine do that. No one will have objection on this.But in the mean time if your boss likes another person's kissing up approach in this competitive world then what will you do.Then You will have nothing to do just to improve your skill i.e. "kissing up". So don't waste time on this, just be confident, a right opportunity will come where you can fit.So improve other skills which are necessary to fight in this world but not that one.

To get ahead, you need to win trust and build good relationship with your boss, but this is different from kissing up to your boss.

To get ahead, you first need to brush up your skill and competencies.  You then need to work hard and to your job well.  You also need to contribute to your team because teamwork is inevitable for you as an individual to peform well, and this needs help and support from your boss.  In addition, if your boss gets ahead, possibility of your team and you get ahead increases.

Boss is not 100% correct all the time.  There are some occasions in which you need to make your boss realize that he/she needs to re-think, in an appropriate way, which can be done under good relationship with your boss.  You cannot be yes man/woman all the time.  Truly good boss would highly evaluate such subordinate.

If you think that you can do nothing and you are useless and good for nothing then you agree. If you are not then you should not agree with it. You have experiance ,skill,knowledge and positive attitude then you must not agree with this debate.

If you have the skills to do the job assigned to you and your boss is a reasonable professional (not the best or the worst), there should be no need to for you kiss and progress. if there is no vindictiveness or nasty nature in your boss, merit alone should suffice

Well said Darshana! If have qualities in u then u can go head yourself

I agree. After all , one's job is just aspect of one's life. Everyone will agree that in being sycophantic to my boss I am in some way compromising my integrity and self-respect. If I can do it with my boss , I can do it in any of my other relationships , with my family members , with my friends , colleagues , business partners ... Where will it end ?

In the process , my life is degraded ; is this degradation worth whatever I think I may gain at my workplace ?

I don't think so.

After all , if I am not able to manage with my boss , nothing prevents me from finding some other job which will allow me to do well retaining my dignity and honour.

" Being ourselves is very easy then change or act, if we change or act its happens life long". To be in a same or to have job security its not a right thing to do. If our stats is perfect, then there is no need to do, " what the tittle suggest"

i agree with Darshana,s point of view.The only ingredient  to draw attention of a boss is sincerity of work and update with latest technology to improve upon your   working.The boss is not a "totem"but he would like your "tour de force".